Children Obey Your Parents In the Lord

Posted on March 4, 2010 by Kris
Filed Under Home and Family | 2 Comments

In Ephesians 5:1-4, Paul gives instructions on how to have happy, obedient children.  He first speaks to the children, telling them to be obedient.  This puts some amount of responsibility upon the children.  They are told to be obedient “for this is right.”  It is simply the right thing to do.  God has established an order to the family, and children being obedient to their parents is a part of that order, and a part of having a peaceful and happy home.  But, there is also some responsibility placed upon parents in these verses.  How can a child be obedient unless they are taught to be obedient by their parents?  It is quite obvious, by observing the actions of children in many places, that children are not naturally obedient.  They have to be instructed!  The wise man, as he wrote  the Proverbs acknowledged this fact.  Consider one proverb that is often either overlooked, or explained away (mostly by unsuccessful parents):

Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6)

Parents are told that they are to “train up a child in the way he should go.”  Their responsibility is to provide the instruction, as well as the discipline that is necessary to insure that their children are on the right path.  It is the parental responsibility to provide godly instruction, defining for the child the way of the Lord.  Parents should realize that children will go in the direction that they are led.  If the child is heading in the wrong direction spiritually, parents should look for their own shortcomings, rather than make excuses for their children’s failures.

It should be noted that discipline is a necessary part of the training process.  It has become politically incorrect to suggest that punishing children is acceptable in today’s society.  However, as with everything else, God’s way is always the best way!  And God’s way includes punishment for disobedience.  Again, consider the wisdom of the author of Proverbs:

He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly. (Proverbs 13:24)

Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him. (Proverbs 22:15)

Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod, And deliver his soul from hell. (Proverbs 23:13-14)

These passages are not encouraging child abuse in any way (as many detractors would suggest).  Just the opposite is true.  These passages encourage the loving discipline that is necessary to cause a child to conform to the proper path.  God Himself will discipline the unruly of His people in the same loving way:

And you have forgotten the exhortation which speaks to you as to sons: “My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the Lord loves He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives.” If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. (Hebrews 12:5-11)

The latter part of Proverbs 22:6 shows the reward of bringing a child up in the proper way:  he will not depart from it.  That is a reward for both the parents and the child.  He will reap the rewards of a blessed spiritual life, and the parents will receive the reward of watching their child whom they love continuing in faithful service to God.  This also can serve as a gauge of how well a parent has done their job.  The wise man said that if they are trained properly, they will not depart from the right way.  This in no way removes the free will of the child.  It emphasizes the result that a child raised in the right way will make the proper choices to continue in faithful service to God.  He will understand the need to be obedient to God, and will shun the temptation to fall away because he understands the consequence of such a decision.  This also puts blame upon the parents of a child who does not continue in the right path.  Most of the time, those on the outside of the relationship will be able to see some failing that was present in the training process that led to the unfaithfulness of a child that chose the wrong path.  It is sometimes hard for parents to see, or at least to admit their shortfalls, but that does not mean that they are not there.  To ignore shortcomings, or make excuse for them is not profitable.  Even failures can be used to improve in the future, or to help other parents in the training of their children.

Parents often make the mistake of preparing for failure.  They will talk about how the wise man was only making a general statement, and did not really mean that every child that is raised properly will remain faithful.  They talk about “doing the best they can.”  They talk about how failure is not really their fault.  Many parents have destroyed the lives and souls of all of their children, and then refused to take any blame for the failure.  They blame it all on the children–after all, they had to make their own choices.  While it is true that every individual has to make his own choices, children would be much better equipped to make those choices if parents were more diligent in their own responsibilities of training their children properly!

Parents, please take your obligations to your children seriously.  They need more than a comfortable bed and three meals per day.  They need you to take on the responsibility of training them properly.  They want you to establish the boundaries for them, to put them on the right path.  Trust the wise man.  If you do your job right, when they are old, they will not depart from the right path.  Then they will teach their children.  Instead of having “a generation that knows not God” we will have generations that arise that are faithful to God!

Popularity: 26% [?]

Wives Submit to Your Husbands

Posted on February 23, 2010 by Kris
Filed Under Home and Family | 1 Comment

In Ephesians 5:22, the apostle Paul told wives that they are to submit to their husbands. This verse has probably upset more women than any other verse in the Bible! Many view Paul as being sexist or a chauvinist. Many women view this passage as outdated and not applicable any more. Some simply react like King Jehoiakim (Jeremiah 36:20-26) and cut this passage (at least effectively) from their Bibles. How dare Paul suggest that women are to be submissive to their husbands?

Those who take such great offense to this passage don’t really understand what Paul is teaching.  They think that submission must be a bad thing, and that it is demeaning to women.  However, in the very context, Paul shows that this submission is not a demeaning thing!  Just prior to verse 22, Paul gave instructions for all Christians to have an attitude of submissiveness (Ephesians 5:21).  Also, in this context, Paul shows that wives are to be submissive in the same way that the church is submissive to Christ.  It is amazing how many people will think of the woman’s role as being demeaning, but the role of the church before Christ is never considered!  It should be viewed as a great honor to be compared in relationship with the church!

In practice, what does it mean for a woman to be in submission to her husband?  It means that she is willing to let him be the head of the household, and that she is willing to abide by the decisions that he makes.  It means that she will be obedient to him in all things (Titus 2:5).  Some women develop the attitude that they will be submissive, and they will be obedient to their husbands because that is what they have to do.  They will do it, but they aren’t going to be happy about it.  They will do what he says, but she is going to complain about it.  Or she will speak evil of him to others, ridiculing his decisions and instructions.  They believe that they have been submissive, even though they act this way, because they have technically been obedient.  But, consider another verse, in which Paul gives further instruction concerning her role.  In Ephesians 5:33, Paul tells wives to respect their husbands.  This is a part of being submissive to them.  If a wife truly respects her husband, she will not say disparaging things about him.  She will not complain about the decisions that he makes, or about doing what he asks her to do.  Even if “his way” turns out to be wrong, she will not mistreat him, or speak in a poor manner concerning him.

Wives should look upon their role in the family as a position of joy.  God has set every role in the family to serve the purpose of making the family run smoothly and without turmoil.  He is not punishing a woman by telling her to be submissive, nor is He relegating her to second class citizenry.  In the role He has given, the wife has great opportunity to do good.  If one doubts this, she should read again Proverbs 31:10-31.  The list that is provided for her shows just how much benefit she is to her family, and to her community. She certainly can be of great benefit to her brethren as well (Titus 2:3-5).  Being submissive does not take anything away from her ability to be a strong, integral, and necessary part of the family, the community, and the church!

Women should never view the role they have been given as something negative.  They should see it as the important role that it is.  They should remember that they are compared to the Lord’s own church, and that they should accept their role just as the church should accept its role.  The acceptance of roles, by every member of the family, will lead to having a peaceful, and prosperous family.  We can all have what God desires for us–perfect homes.  We just all have to do our part!

Popularity: 21% [?]

Hide it From God

Posted on February 17, 2010 by Kris
Filed Under Exhortation | 2 Comments

It is amazing how often people think they come up with something new, when in fact, there is nothing new under the sun (Ecclesiastes 1:9).  People today have the concept that “going to church” is the extent of what it takes to be pleasing to God.  Anything that they do in their personal lives during the week is absolved by the act of going to a house of worship.  This conveys the idea that they believe that they can hide their sin from God.  Perhaps God cannot see, or does not notice any sin that is committed away from His house?  Maybe God just chooses to ignore all sin, as long as a person puts forth at least the pretense of worshiping Him when Sunday rolls around?

Some are not nearly so blatant in their willingness to sin.  They will work diligently to hide their sin from their brethren, from their families, and think that by doing so they hide their sin from God.  They believe what happens “behind closed doors” is only their business, and no one else should ever care about it.  We often forget that it is impossible to hide ourselves  from God.  There is no place on earth that we can go that the eye of God cannot see us.  Consider the writing of the psalmist in Psalm 139:7-12:

Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. If I take the wings of the morning, And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, Even there Your hand shall lead me, And Your right hand shall hold me. If I say, “Surely the darkness shall fall on me,” Even the night shall be light about me; Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You, But the night shines as the day; The darkness and the light are both alike to You.

Even with this warning, people still try to “pull the wool” over the eyes of God!  But, this is nothing new.  In fact, from the very beginning people have been trying to hide their sin from God.  Adam and Eve, while in the garden, tried to hide their sin from God.  Note Genesis 3:7-8:

Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings. And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden.

The thought that Adam and Eve could hide among the trees in the Garden of Eden is just as ludicrous as the thought that we can hide our sin from God today!  It is silly to even consider the possibility that we are capable of keeping something secret from God.

Achan tried to hide his sin from God in a much different way.  When the Children of Israel went into the Promised Land, they first attacked the city of Jericho.  God commanded the people to devote all that was in the city to Him, which meant that they were to destroy it all.  They were not allowed to take any of the spoils of war.  But, Achan decided to steal some of the spoil and hid e them in the floor of his tent.  Because of the sin of Achan, the people of Israel were defeated in battle when they went against the city of Ai.  After the sin was made public, God devised a plan to expose Achan for what he had done.  Joshua called upon Achan to stop hiding his sin:

Now Joshua said to Achan, “My son, I beg you, give glory to the Lord God of Israel, and make confession to Him, and tell me now what you have done; do not hide it from me.” And Achan answered Joshua and said, “Indeed I have sinned against the Lord God of Israel… (Joshua 7:19-20)

In both of these cases, the perpetrators thought that by hiding their sin from God they could avoid the judgment that they deserved.  They believed, evidently, that by hiding what they had done, God would not see their transgression, and if He could not see it, He could not punish for it.  But, they seemingly forgot what many today forget:  God is not man!  One may successfully hide themselves and their sin from other men, but it is impossible to hide from God:

And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account. (Hebrews 4:13)

Even if one is successful in hiding sin from every other person on earth, they will still have to give an answer to God for their actions (2 Corinthians 5:9-11).  The problem is that we often deceive ourselves into accepting sin in our lives, essentially “hiding” the sin from ourselves!  We must be willing to examine ourselves against the word of God, and expel any sin that we find therein (James 1:22-25).  Hiding our sin will do nothing for us, except condemn us in the last day.  Adam and Eve couldn’t hide from God.  Achan couldn’t hide from God.  I can’t hide from God, and neither can you!

Popularity: 26% [?]

Husbands, Love Your Wives…

Posted on February 15, 2010 by Kris
Filed Under Home and Family | 1 Comment

In Ephesians 5:25, Paul wrote, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her…“  Perhaps most people look on that as a given.  Of course a husband loves his wife, at least in our society!  But, there must have been a purpose for the command, else God would not have revealed it through Paul!

Men need to learn to love their wives in the proper way.  This passage is not addressing the “warm fuzzy” feeling that is present in the newlywed’s heart.  Nor is it addressing the physical lust that may drive a physical relationship.  The love that Paul wrote about was the kind of love that Christ had for His church.  What exactly does that mean?

Christ was willing to offer His life up for the church.  That is what many men think of when considering the idea of loving their wives “as Christ also loved the church.”  But, how many husbands are called upon to give up their lives for their wives?  What needs to be understood is that Christ did what was needed for the church!  Husbands, if they love their wives, need to do what is needed for them!

Many husbands who claim that they will “do anything for their wives” actually do very little for them!  They are not concerned about what is needed by their wives, or discount what is needed as being “her job.”  Husbands often are oblivious to what they can do to help their wives.  It is a mistaken interpretation of scripture to think that a man cannot help his wife care for the house of the children simply because she is told to be the “keeper at home.”  Perhaps it is just an excuse to get out of being a help to the wife!  I have seen women who could not call upon their husbands for any kind of assistance because they knew their husbands would not lift a finger to help them.

What it comes down to is that this type of love needs to be shown, not just talked about!  A husband can claim that he loves his wife, but if it is not shown, then love is not really there.  In 1 John 3:18, John told his readers to “...not  love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.“  He was not speaking about the marital relationship there, but the principle could certainly be applied.  It is not good enough just to tell your wife that you love her; you need to show her!  Are you, as a husband, willing to make sacrifices for your wife?  Do you give up things that are valuable to you, so that you can provide for her?  Are you willing to give up time, or hobbies to provide what she might need?

While it may be noble for a husband to say that he will die for his wife, the opportunity to do so will probably never arise.  That makes the gesture somewhat hollow.  What a wife wants is for her husband to show her that he loves her by giving what she needs.  Show your love by giving of yourself for her.  Help her where she needs help.  Make sacrifices that will benefit her.  When you do, she will know that you do love her in “deed and truth.”

Popularity: 11% [?]

Choosing to Do Right

Posted on February 10, 2010 by Kris
Filed Under Exhortation | Leave a Comment

Choosing to do the right thing can sometimes be difficult.  There are many different criteria that may affect our decisions.  Sometimes it may take us some effort to determine what the right thing is.  Sometimes it may just take some effort for us to implement what we know to be the right thing!  Many may continue to practice sin under the guise of trying to figure out what the right thing to do is!  I want you to think about some of the things that might help us all to choose to do right, and eschew evil (1 Peter 3:11).

First, determine to act righteously in general.  Acting in the right manner doesn’t happen by accident.  It takes a conscious effort to commit to being faithful to God.  That effort must be put forth each and every day.  We cannot let our guard down, or else Satan will take advantage of our lack of preparation.  He is always out and about, looking for the perfect opportunity to cause us to stumble.The decision to “do the right thing” shouldn’t be made on a case by case basis.  Instead, we should make a daily commitment to do what is right.  Then, when the specific decisions have to be made, we have already determined that we will do what the Lord wants us to do!

Second, stop being selfish!  Lets face it, most of the time when we make the decision to do wrong, it is for purely selfish reasons.  We want to participate in something that God has forbidden, so we make the choice to be disobedient.  If we are able to put God first, rather than ourselves, then the decision to do right becomes much easier!  Instead of seeking to fulfill our own lusts, our own desires, we must put God and His will first in our lives.  The example of Moses as cited by the writer of Hebrews illustrates this point well.  Consider Hebrews 11:24-26:

By faith Moses, when he became of age, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter, choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God than to enjoy the passing pleasures of sin, esteeming the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures in Egypt; for he looked to the reward.

Moses had the opportunity to have all that his heart desired, physically.  But, he chose do what was right, and serve God.  He was able to look beyond the “passing pleasures of sin,” which is the difficulty for many people today!

Third, realize that it is often not the determination of what is right that is difficult, but the practicing of that which we have determined to be right.  Sometimes we may truly struggle with figuring out what the righteous thing to do is.  But, that is not usually the case.  Most of the time, we can quickly identify what is right.  More often we struggle with implementing what we know to be the right thing.  We may try to hide behind the façade that we believe we are acceptable in our sin, but we know in our hearts that God is not going to accept our tainted service!

Often, making the right choices comes down to a matter of dedication to God.  Are we devoted enough to Him to do what He asks?  Or are we going to be devoted to our own selfish desires?  Which is more important?  We may say with our lips that God is at the top of our priority list, but do we show that in our practices?  When we choose to please ourselves, rather than please God, then we are putting ourselves in that top spot of our priority list!

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. (Matthew 6:33)

Popularity: 31% [?]

older posts »